My daughter is the one with the moustache or did I get it backwards? Did I mention that she is French?
Sunday, July 09, 2006
Taking a Bite out of the Big Apple
I have a number of reflections after spending a week in the Big Apple.
It was fun to be there on July 4 on the River Cruise and watch the fireworks. I am posting a few pictures of them. It was even better when all the boat horns went off when the fireworks concluded. Thank you Macy's for the great fireworks. Thanks Brokerbelle for coming up with the idea of the cruise.
It was a bit disappointing that some of my best pictures are of the "Naked Cowboy." Yes, boys and girls, there really is a naked cowboy just as they show on television. And I have the pictures to prove it. My blog is a family rated blog and so I may or may not post some of them.
Probably the most impressive thing was to go to Ground Zero where the World Trade Center used to be. A few pictures are posted. It makes you think. Things were very quiet there.
HarleyDad
It was fun to be there on July 4 on the River Cruise and watch the fireworks. I am posting a few pictures of them. It was even better when all the boat horns went off when the fireworks concluded. Thank you Macy's for the great fireworks. Thanks Brokerbelle for coming up with the idea of the cruise.
It was a bit disappointing that some of my best pictures are of the "Naked Cowboy." Yes, boys and girls, there really is a naked cowboy just as they show on television. And I have the pictures to prove it. My blog is a family rated blog and so I may or may not post some of them.
Probably the most impressive thing was to go to Ground Zero where the World Trade Center used to be. A few pictures are posted. It makes you think. Things were very quiet there.
HarleyDad
Tuesday, July 04, 2006
Sunday, July 02, 2006
Big Apple
The Clampetts are heading for the Big Apple. This ain't your average Ozarlandia burg. The jalopy is loaded to gills.
Those going to the Big Apple are: HarleyDad, Brokerbelle, Princessbelle, and Christmasbelle.
Christmasbelle is just back from Girl's State where she learned that there are two things that a "young sweet girl" should never see: (i) sausage being made and (ii) legislation being made.
Hopefully, pics will be posted as the Clampetts take a bite out of the Big Apple. We have already purchased a few tickets and so it might be said that "the Big Apple took a bite out of us first."
Oh well, Clampets bite big apple now that is a story like "Man bites dog."
HarleyDad
Those going to the Big Apple are: HarleyDad, Brokerbelle, Princessbelle, and Christmasbelle.
Christmasbelle is just back from Girl's State where she learned that there are two things that a "young sweet girl" should never see: (i) sausage being made and (ii) legislation being made.
Hopefully, pics will be posted as the Clampetts take a bite out of the Big Apple. We have already purchased a few tickets and so it might be said that "the Big Apple took a bite out of us first."
Oh well, Clampets bite big apple now that is a story like "Man bites dog."
HarleyDad
Friday, June 30, 2006
The Crusader Mentality
The Crusader Mentality
The Crusader mentality is a negative term used by adherents of Islam who resent and resist continued involvement of the U.S. or others who are not Muslims in Islamic countries.
In short the “Crusader” mentality is the flip side of the coin of Jihadist mentality. Both refer to holy war. The Jihadist conducts holy war against infidels (non-Muslims) whereas the Crusader fought to free the holy lands from Islamic control. The Jihadist fights to spread the faith of Islam and believes that death in that enterprise assures him of a spot in Paradise. Likewise, the Crusader believed that death in carrying out their “holy” mission would automatically open a space for the one who died in heaven.
Note the following quote from Osama bin Laden in a tape, as reported by Reuters News Service today:
The lion of jihad ... Abu Musab al-Zarqawi ... was killed in a U.S. raid. We hope to God he accepts him as a martyr," said the speaker who sounded similar to previous recordings attributed to al Qaeda leader bin Laden.
Islam fears the Crusader mentality because it is as absolute as itself. It is similar to the situation where an irresistible force moves an unmovable wall. Both beliefs are absolute in nature, both are extreme and uncompromising, and the result is continued conflict until one side prevails or the two sides are so exhausted that they default to the status quo.
Although there are evangelical groups in the U.S. who may support Israel, this fight (either fortunately or unfortunately, depending on your point of view) is not about spreading Christianity into Islamic countries or setting up a Christian state. Instead the fight appears to be about self-protection (against Islamic attacks on the U.S.—elsewhere in the world or in the U.S. itself). It is about a declaration of war by Islamic militants against the U.S.
To some degree, the fact that the U.S. has been allied with Israel automatically caused the U.S. to be seen in the same light as Israel, which to an Islamic mentality is very reasonable. You are known by your friends.
However, our fight must be about our democratic values. There should be freedom of religion, freedom of press, and treatment of women as equals. In Islamic countries, this is not allowed. These freedoms are worth dying for. Therefore, the issue is not the expansion of Christianity into Islamic countries. The issue is one of individual freedoms.
Ah, but you may respond that those people do not want individual freedom (This sounds like a discourse with the Grand Inquisitor in the Brothers Karamazov). My response is this. First, do not be so sure. People in Islamic countries are not able to speak or write dissent without punishment. Second, people desire order even more than freedom. When the National Socialist brought order in economic chaos, the majority of people were content to live under it even if the minorities, including the Jews, were persecuted.
In Afghanistan, people may prefer to live under the Taliban than under a place where every local leader is a tyrant and there are no laws. And so they may be forced to live under draconian Taliban religious law rather than no law altogether. They may prefer bad laws harshly enforced by those with limited corruption to no law and corrupt enforcement. It is not a matter of religion, but of life and of getting along in hard times. It is a human condition and predicament, and not uniquely Islamic.
Is there a middle ground in the conflict between the Crusader mentality and the Jihadist? Unfortunately, for the true believers on either side there is not. However, sometimes there can be grounds for compromise by enlightened men of good will.
During the Crusades, the great Islamic leader Saladin, did not kill all the infidels in Jerusalem when he took it. He let them live. He was more generous and enlightened than today’s Islamist militants.
For years Jerusalem has been a free city where many beliefs coexist. And sometimes people of good will have cooperated, even in areas of belief. For example, two Christian groups have competed for centuries over the Church of the Nativity. The keeper of keys of the door for that venerable church is a neutral Muslim. Although, ironic, this is a symbol that people of different faiths can live in peace if they work together.
Unfortunately, people of peace, when Christian, may be viewed as less than stellar. Muslims who work for peace may be viewed by those of their religion as being less than stellar Muslims. That is the nature of extremism: it tries to wipe out the reasonable people who would compromise. No compromise is allowed by extremists of whatever religious persuasion.
Jesus spoke of a broad road that leads to damnation. There are many desiring to journey on the broad road of hatred.
As for those who are dying by suicide to kill others, I have this thought (which I admit is not Scriptural). What if God were to give the key to Paradise or to heaven to the victims of this war? Under Islamic law, opportunity is often given to the victims to have their say. What if the Supreme Being did the same thing?
What if the perpetrator of a suicide bombing were to show up in heaven and find that the key to Paradise or Heaven had been granted to those victimized by the action? What if the innocent people harmed by the action have the key to Heaven or Paradise?
Perhaps a young soldier blown up by the suicide has the key. The person who committed the suicide has to ask for the key from the young soldier. The young soldier might say: “I was drafted into the war; I believed I was fighting for my country; I never again saw my young wife, or my parents, or my sweet child. Why should I give the key to you?” What if the person committing suicide killed a young innocent child who had nothing to do with the war at all, or a young mother and her baby. In this scenario we ultimately must find that the word “martyr” is an inappropriate word to use and that “killer” is a more appropriate word.
The Crusader mentality is a negative term used by adherents of Islam who resent and resist continued involvement of the U.S. or others who are not Muslims in Islamic countries.
In short the “Crusader” mentality is the flip side of the coin of Jihadist mentality. Both refer to holy war. The Jihadist conducts holy war against infidels (non-Muslims) whereas the Crusader fought to free the holy lands from Islamic control. The Jihadist fights to spread the faith of Islam and believes that death in that enterprise assures him of a spot in Paradise. Likewise, the Crusader believed that death in carrying out their “holy” mission would automatically open a space for the one who died in heaven.
Note the following quote from Osama bin Laden in a tape, as reported by Reuters News Service today:
The lion of jihad ... Abu Musab al-Zarqawi ... was killed in a U.S. raid. We hope to God he accepts him as a martyr," said the speaker who sounded similar to previous recordings attributed to al Qaeda leader bin Laden.
Islam fears the Crusader mentality because it is as absolute as itself. It is similar to the situation where an irresistible force moves an unmovable wall. Both beliefs are absolute in nature, both are extreme and uncompromising, and the result is continued conflict until one side prevails or the two sides are so exhausted that they default to the status quo.
Although there are evangelical groups in the U.S. who may support Israel, this fight (either fortunately or unfortunately, depending on your point of view) is not about spreading Christianity into Islamic countries or setting up a Christian state. Instead the fight appears to be about self-protection (against Islamic attacks on the U.S.—elsewhere in the world or in the U.S. itself). It is about a declaration of war by Islamic militants against the U.S.
To some degree, the fact that the U.S. has been allied with Israel automatically caused the U.S. to be seen in the same light as Israel, which to an Islamic mentality is very reasonable. You are known by your friends.
However, our fight must be about our democratic values. There should be freedom of religion, freedom of press, and treatment of women as equals. In Islamic countries, this is not allowed. These freedoms are worth dying for. Therefore, the issue is not the expansion of Christianity into Islamic countries. The issue is one of individual freedoms.
Ah, but you may respond that those people do not want individual freedom (This sounds like a discourse with the Grand Inquisitor in the Brothers Karamazov). My response is this. First, do not be so sure. People in Islamic countries are not able to speak or write dissent without punishment. Second, people desire order even more than freedom. When the National Socialist brought order in economic chaos, the majority of people were content to live under it even if the minorities, including the Jews, were persecuted.
In Afghanistan, people may prefer to live under the Taliban than under a place where every local leader is a tyrant and there are no laws. And so they may be forced to live under draconian Taliban religious law rather than no law altogether. They may prefer bad laws harshly enforced by those with limited corruption to no law and corrupt enforcement. It is not a matter of religion, but of life and of getting along in hard times. It is a human condition and predicament, and not uniquely Islamic.
Is there a middle ground in the conflict between the Crusader mentality and the Jihadist? Unfortunately, for the true believers on either side there is not. However, sometimes there can be grounds for compromise by enlightened men of good will.
During the Crusades, the great Islamic leader Saladin, did not kill all the infidels in Jerusalem when he took it. He let them live. He was more generous and enlightened than today’s Islamist militants.
For years Jerusalem has been a free city where many beliefs coexist. And sometimes people of good will have cooperated, even in areas of belief. For example, two Christian groups have competed for centuries over the Church of the Nativity. The keeper of keys of the door for that venerable church is a neutral Muslim. Although, ironic, this is a symbol that people of different faiths can live in peace if they work together.
Unfortunately, people of peace, when Christian, may be viewed as less than stellar. Muslims who work for peace may be viewed by those of their religion as being less than stellar Muslims. That is the nature of extremism: it tries to wipe out the reasonable people who would compromise. No compromise is allowed by extremists of whatever religious persuasion.
Jesus spoke of a broad road that leads to damnation. There are many desiring to journey on the broad road of hatred.
As for those who are dying by suicide to kill others, I have this thought (which I admit is not Scriptural). What if God were to give the key to Paradise or to heaven to the victims of this war? Under Islamic law, opportunity is often given to the victims to have their say. What if the Supreme Being did the same thing?
What if the perpetrator of a suicide bombing were to show up in heaven and find that the key to Paradise or Heaven had been granted to those victimized by the action? What if the innocent people harmed by the action have the key to Heaven or Paradise?
Perhaps a young soldier blown up by the suicide has the key. The person who committed the suicide has to ask for the key from the young soldier. The young soldier might say: “I was drafted into the war; I believed I was fighting for my country; I never again saw my young wife, or my parents, or my sweet child. Why should I give the key to you?” What if the person committing suicide killed a young innocent child who had nothing to do with the war at all, or a young mother and her baby. In this scenario we ultimately must find that the word “martyr” is an inappropriate word to use and that “killer” is a more appropriate word.
Thursday, June 29, 2006
Wake Up, Church
Wake Up, Church.
“Wake up and strengthen the things that remain, which were about to die; for I have not found your deeds in the sight of My God.”
---Rev. 3:2
An early American story tells about Rip Van Winkle by Washington, Irving. It recounts the story of a man who falls asleep in the mountains and sleeps for twenty years. When he awakes he finds that everything has changed and that he has missed the American Revolution.
The U.S. church has been like Rip Van Winkle. We have fallen asleep and while we were asleep profound events have occurred. And our sleep has been far longer than 20 years.
The U.S. church during its period of sleep has been blissfully unaware of the new challenges that have risen in the world.
One of the challenges for the church is population growth. For instance the world population has been increasing according to the statistics below according to an article on Population Growth found in Wikipedia:
1802—1 billion
1961—3 billion
1974—4 billion
1987—5 billion
1999—6 billion
See the world population clock at http://www.census.gov/ipc/www/popclockworld.html
in order to check the current world population. At the time that this is written, it is in excess of 6.5 billion people.
Some of the fastest growing population areas are outside of the U.S. including China, India and the Mideast. Non-Christian religions, especially in India and China are expanding not through conversion, but through population growth alone.
Further, U.S. dollars and jobs are flowing steadily from the U.S. to other parts of the world. The manufacturing industry is step by step moving outside of the U.S. and going to the Orient. For instance, go to the local Wal-Mart store and start picking up products and you will see where they are manufactured.
U.S. oil comes largely from the Middle East and U.S. dollars are flowing in exchange for this oil in order to maintain large numbers of U.S. vehicles running.
In addition, U.S. corporations are burdened with increasing governmental regulations that result with them being inefficient when compared to their international counterparts. Competing, with one arm tied behind their backs, they are increasingly being outdistanced by their international competitors. In an effort to compete they are moving most manufacturing operations overseas. International investments are becoming more lucrative for investors and U.S. investments are becoming less attractive.
Yet the church sleeps on as momentous events occur.
As we trade our wealth for oil, this wealth flows to Islamic countries where there is no religious freedom. The church has not made an issue of this, because it sleeps.
Meanwhile, world religions have grown. Some of the statistics are as follows:
Islam—1.3 billion
Secular, Agnostic, Athiest—1.1 billion
Hinduism—900 million
Buddhists and Chinese Traditionalists—770 million.
In Islamic societies, there has been for years a spiritual Berlin wall keeping Christianity out. Those who convert are persecuted more greatly than under old communism. Yet the church has said little. Islam is tied to political power . Interestingly, in “Christian countries” people are free to convert to Islam. In Islamic countries, they forbidden to convert. Two different sets of rules.
We live in a double standard world. It is considered reasonable for Muslims to have state supported religion. However, if Protestants or Catholics did so today where the religious leaders ruled, there would be world-wide complaint.
Of course, as these population numbers continue to increase, we look around ourselves with bleary myopic eyes and hardly see no change at all. All of this because the church has lost its world vision for missionary work and evangelization.
The U.S. church has lost its vision because we have taken our eyes off Jesus Christ. We have been more interested in fighting each other than facing a hopelessly lost world.
We have built ourselves, large churches, akin to spiritual pleasure palaces rather than face the myriad of beliefs. We attend these churches, give to support to their large superstructures and return to life having paid our spiritual tithe so to speak. In return, we hope to receive some regular help from God for our problems.
How does one keep an international perspective. The Latter Day Saints have done it by sending their young men and women as missionaries to other parts of the world. An attorney I work with, for instance, has sent one of his children to Brazil to work there as a missionary for two years. That child will return knowing Portuguese and having a good feel for Brazil and Sao Paulo. In short, the young man will have an international perspective.
Other Christians allow their children to go on mission trips to foreign countries where they pick up a feel for another culture, some of the language and a knowledge that much of the world is far different than us. An emphasis on missions or world evangelism is important. We are instructed to “Go unto the entire world, making disciples “.
Like Rip Van Winkle, it is time for the church to wake up and be aware of what is going on around us. It is not a case of business as usual.
In the U.S. we deal with a growing drug crisis, national and international crime, an increasing prison population fueled largely, but not exclusively by, drugs and increasing abortion. Our society which at one time was based on God, if not Christianity, is rapidly being transformed into a godless society with a hedonistic and materialistic moral code. Instead of evolving into a more enlightened society we are falling back into more pluralistic and materialistic societies like the Greeks and Romans.
Rip Van Winkle drank the wine of the trolls and went to sleep. Our drink has been drugs, and entertainment. Pornography and violence have become our opiates Our books are filled with things that would have been abhorrent to earlier generations and the media must keep up serving new and unusual entertainment in order to keep the attention of the viewers. Video games must do the same.
And so while the church has been asleep, society is changing. And the change is not unexpected. It is changing back to its basic fleshly roots.
How is this situation to be remedied? To be frank, I do not have a good answer to this question.
However, I do know this. Sometimes, an event will cause us to wake up. We are jarred or shaken. It may be a wrong turn down a barrio. It may be an overseas trip. It may be having a child on drugs. But something wakes us up. It jars us out of our complacency. And we remember who we are. We remember that we are the Children of God, born from the blood sacrifice of Jesus Christ. We are the Family of God.
We return to the Word of God, the Holy Scriptures. We return to prayer. We seek the face of God. We ask for the guidance of God.
The Holy Spirit will give us this guidance and will lead the way. We return to our spiritual roots-Jesus Christ and we follow the guidance given to us. Our love for Christ begins to transcend our love for ourselves, our families and our world.
I can not tell you what to do or where you will go. I can only tell you to seek God and He will be found. Follow God and He will lead you.
My prayer is that the church will wake up and return to its first love, Jesus Christ. In Christ lies our future and our destiny.
It is to Him we must return.
“Wake up and strengthen the things that remain, which were about to die; for I have not found your deeds in the sight of My God.”
---Rev. 3:2
An early American story tells about Rip Van Winkle by Washington, Irving. It recounts the story of a man who falls asleep in the mountains and sleeps for twenty years. When he awakes he finds that everything has changed and that he has missed the American Revolution.
The U.S. church has been like Rip Van Winkle. We have fallen asleep and while we were asleep profound events have occurred. And our sleep has been far longer than 20 years.
The U.S. church during its period of sleep has been blissfully unaware of the new challenges that have risen in the world.
One of the challenges for the church is population growth. For instance the world population has been increasing according to the statistics below according to an article on Population Growth found in Wikipedia:
1802—1 billion
1961—3 billion
1974—4 billion
1987—5 billion
1999—6 billion
See the world population clock at http://www.census.gov/ipc/www/popclockworld.html
in order to check the current world population. At the time that this is written, it is in excess of 6.5 billion people.
Some of the fastest growing population areas are outside of the U.S. including China, India and the Mideast. Non-Christian religions, especially in India and China are expanding not through conversion, but through population growth alone.
Further, U.S. dollars and jobs are flowing steadily from the U.S. to other parts of the world. The manufacturing industry is step by step moving outside of the U.S. and going to the Orient. For instance, go to the local Wal-Mart store and start picking up products and you will see where they are manufactured.
U.S. oil comes largely from the Middle East and U.S. dollars are flowing in exchange for this oil in order to maintain large numbers of U.S. vehicles running.
In addition, U.S. corporations are burdened with increasing governmental regulations that result with them being inefficient when compared to their international counterparts. Competing, with one arm tied behind their backs, they are increasingly being outdistanced by their international competitors. In an effort to compete they are moving most manufacturing operations overseas. International investments are becoming more lucrative for investors and U.S. investments are becoming less attractive.
Yet the church sleeps on as momentous events occur.
As we trade our wealth for oil, this wealth flows to Islamic countries where there is no religious freedom. The church has not made an issue of this, because it sleeps.
Meanwhile, world religions have grown. Some of the statistics are as follows:
Islam—1.3 billion
Secular, Agnostic, Athiest—1.1 billion
Hinduism—900 million
Buddhists and Chinese Traditionalists—770 million.
In Islamic societies, there has been for years a spiritual Berlin wall keeping Christianity out. Those who convert are persecuted more greatly than under old communism. Yet the church has said little. Islam is tied to political power . Interestingly, in “Christian countries” people are free to convert to Islam. In Islamic countries, they forbidden to convert. Two different sets of rules.
We live in a double standard world. It is considered reasonable for Muslims to have state supported religion. However, if Protestants or Catholics did so today where the religious leaders ruled, there would be world-wide complaint.
Of course, as these population numbers continue to increase, we look around ourselves with bleary myopic eyes and hardly see no change at all. All of this because the church has lost its world vision for missionary work and evangelization.
The U.S. church has lost its vision because we have taken our eyes off Jesus Christ. We have been more interested in fighting each other than facing a hopelessly lost world.
We have built ourselves, large churches, akin to spiritual pleasure palaces rather than face the myriad of beliefs. We attend these churches, give to support to their large superstructures and return to life having paid our spiritual tithe so to speak. In return, we hope to receive some regular help from God for our problems.
How does one keep an international perspective. The Latter Day Saints have done it by sending their young men and women as missionaries to other parts of the world. An attorney I work with, for instance, has sent one of his children to Brazil to work there as a missionary for two years. That child will return knowing Portuguese and having a good feel for Brazil and Sao Paulo. In short, the young man will have an international perspective.
Other Christians allow their children to go on mission trips to foreign countries where they pick up a feel for another culture, some of the language and a knowledge that much of the world is far different than us. An emphasis on missions or world evangelism is important. We are instructed to “Go unto the entire world, making disciples “.
Like Rip Van Winkle, it is time for the church to wake up and be aware of what is going on around us. It is not a case of business as usual.
In the U.S. we deal with a growing drug crisis, national and international crime, an increasing prison population fueled largely, but not exclusively by, drugs and increasing abortion. Our society which at one time was based on God, if not Christianity, is rapidly being transformed into a godless society with a hedonistic and materialistic moral code. Instead of evolving into a more enlightened society we are falling back into more pluralistic and materialistic societies like the Greeks and Romans.
Rip Van Winkle drank the wine of the trolls and went to sleep. Our drink has been drugs, and entertainment. Pornography and violence have become our opiates Our books are filled with things that would have been abhorrent to earlier generations and the media must keep up serving new and unusual entertainment in order to keep the attention of the viewers. Video games must do the same.
And so while the church has been asleep, society is changing. And the change is not unexpected. It is changing back to its basic fleshly roots.
How is this situation to be remedied? To be frank, I do not have a good answer to this question.
However, I do know this. Sometimes, an event will cause us to wake up. We are jarred or shaken. It may be a wrong turn down a barrio. It may be an overseas trip. It may be having a child on drugs. But something wakes us up. It jars us out of our complacency. And we remember who we are. We remember that we are the Children of God, born from the blood sacrifice of Jesus Christ. We are the Family of God.
We return to the Word of God, the Holy Scriptures. We return to prayer. We seek the face of God. We ask for the guidance of God.
The Holy Spirit will give us this guidance and will lead the way. We return to our spiritual roots-Jesus Christ and we follow the guidance given to us. Our love for Christ begins to transcend our love for ourselves, our families and our world.
I can not tell you what to do or where you will go. I can only tell you to seek God and He will be found. Follow God and He will lead you.
My prayer is that the church will wake up and return to its first love, Jesus Christ. In Christ lies our future and our destiny.
It is to Him we must return.
Saturday, June 24, 2006
Pi is not Square.
Pi is not square; pie is round.
Pie sings. Generally you have to cut it. Once a piece of pie is cut, it begins to sing. This is especially true of lemon merange pie, especially if it has grahm cracker crust. Key lime pie does the same.
During the day, when there are sounds and noises and meetings and kids about, you song is a low song that you almost can not hear.
Pie sings better at night and its sirene song is sung best between 12 p.m. and 3:00 a.m. in the morning. The pie sings at its loudest. I can hear it sing : "Eat me, I am good for you--I am the best pie in the universe."
When you are asleep and T.V. is not blaring and there are no sounds of phones or of children, then the ears can hear the seductive sound of pie promising delights unheard of, if only you will get up and visit it. It sings: "I am delicious, I am calory free, eat me and you will live forever."
Pie sings lying songs and like the sirene songs sung to Odyseus of old, it attempts to take your diet and crash it disastrously on the rocks.
Attemps to shut down pie songs by placing pie into refrigerators has been proven scientifically to have been unsuccessful. It seems that cold only calls pie to sing louder and more insistantly.
Pie has also proven to contribute to memory loss. Many of you like me have opened the refrigerator in the morning to get the milk out and you notice that another pie of pie is missing from the pie plate, and you wonder where it went.
And while you are at it, most pie goes great with milk. So you sit down in the morning to have a glass of milk and a piece of pie instead of the scrambled egg that is your normal breakfast.
And the vicious cycle has just begun. Because once pie begins to sing, it continues to sing until the last piece of pie is finally eaten.
What is worse, pie ages well. Like lasagne or certain types of cheese or red wine, it only get better with age or so it is believed. Unfortunately, this can not be proven, since most pie is eaten completely before it has a chance to age.
And so pie has a more haunting melody than the most beautiful tragic opera by Puccinni. Tragically it is wiped out early in the opera; but its memory births more pies that inevitable will sing and call during their short lives until they too are eaten, causing a ghost yard of devastated wrecks of diets surrounding pie and its beautiful sirene song in the night.
Pie sings. Generally you have to cut it. Once a piece of pie is cut, it begins to sing. This is especially true of lemon merange pie, especially if it has grahm cracker crust. Key lime pie does the same.
During the day, when there are sounds and noises and meetings and kids about, you song is a low song that you almost can not hear.
Pie sings better at night and its sirene song is sung best between 12 p.m. and 3:00 a.m. in the morning. The pie sings at its loudest. I can hear it sing : "Eat me, I am good for you--I am the best pie in the universe."
When you are asleep and T.V. is not blaring and there are no sounds of phones or of children, then the ears can hear the seductive sound of pie promising delights unheard of, if only you will get up and visit it. It sings: "I am delicious, I am calory free, eat me and you will live forever."
Pie sings lying songs and like the sirene songs sung to Odyseus of old, it attempts to take your diet and crash it disastrously on the rocks.
Attemps to shut down pie songs by placing pie into refrigerators has been proven scientifically to have been unsuccessful. It seems that cold only calls pie to sing louder and more insistantly.
Pie has also proven to contribute to memory loss. Many of you like me have opened the refrigerator in the morning to get the milk out and you notice that another pie of pie is missing from the pie plate, and you wonder where it went.
And while you are at it, most pie goes great with milk. So you sit down in the morning to have a glass of milk and a piece of pie instead of the scrambled egg that is your normal breakfast.
And the vicious cycle has just begun. Because once pie begins to sing, it continues to sing until the last piece of pie is finally eaten.
What is worse, pie ages well. Like lasagne or certain types of cheese or red wine, it only get better with age or so it is believed. Unfortunately, this can not be proven, since most pie is eaten completely before it has a chance to age.
And so pie has a more haunting melody than the most beautiful tragic opera by Puccinni. Tragically it is wiped out early in the opera; but its memory births more pies that inevitable will sing and call during their short lives until they too are eaten, causing a ghost yard of devastated wrecks of diets surrounding pie and its beautiful sirene song in the night.
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