Mr. Northwest Correctional
It was not without a certain amount of trepidation that we set out for Northwest Correctional institute for the 2007 Body Builders Competition. The training had been assiduous.
Shan Tora had trained regularly, hours each week, through Karate training. She had been first in all the students in doing her exercises. She had outperformed all the males in her class through doing more and better push-ups then all of them. Her situps were outstanding and she had developed her own six pack until it was taken away from her due to being under drinking age.
HarleyDad was also ready for the competition and had been bulking up and was ready to enter into high repetitive exercises to burn away the bulk. However, being so successful in bulking up, he had not yet gotten to the high repetitions needed to supply that high definition that Shan Tora had already achieved.
Likewise the Emerald Prince was ready to compete utilizing the state owned fitness facility so deftly shown in all the prison movies. Mr. Emerald worked out daily and was cut like an emerald having honed himself through the regular discipline of iron.
And so all of us had high hopes of winning the coveted title of Mr. Northwest Correctional.
The other guests of this friendly state run facility had also been training. But we considered family fitness to be the name of the game.
Even Brokerbelle had gotten into the game. Her training involving stair climbing, laundry lifting, running after Shan Tora and picking up after the other competitive members of the family. This was somewhat like Hercules lifting the heffer every day. As the Heffer and laundry loads grew day by day, Brokerbelle had beoome more fit but due to a bout of recent illness Brokerbelle decided to sit this one out. Also she did not want to shame us.
And so as we entered Northwest Correctional, we were ushered in past the sniff detector and were drug tested to make sure that we were not using steroids or other performance enhancing drugs. I am delighted to say that the family passed in flying colors.
Shan Tora, Harley Dad and the Emerald Prince went into the first body building pose. See the picture above. Unfortunately here our problems began. Shan Tora had a few too many curves and was disqualified from the competition. Inconveniently we had forgotten but the competition was to become Mr. Northwest Correctional. Shan Tora was accused of having taken harmones and six pack or not was unceremoniously disqualified from further participation.
The Emerald Prince and Harley Dad however proceded to the next round.
HarleyDad threw his next body building pose. To his horror he was censured and disqualified. It seems that the judges accused HarleyDad of throwing a pose that looked like a black rolling swastika. Despite vigorous protests from HarleyDad he was branded as a neo-Nazi skinhead by the Twelve Competition Judges who it turned out were all members of the same local synagogue in Cameron, Missouri and HarleyDad was thrown out of the competition.
The Emerald Prince was accorded the title of Mr. Correctional Institute by default and was proclaimed as being cut like a jewel and far above his competitors.
As a result of the Prince's fine showing, HarleyDad and Shan Tora were forced to shovel mountains of quarters into vending machines which in turn spit out mountains of just desserts for the Emerald Prince's great enjoyment. With that being done, we bid a fond adieu to NW Correctional Institute and resolved to meet again for the competition next year.
Harley Dad.
The Emerald Prince is the winner with a somewhat ethereal pose in the clouds.
